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Advice for Dealing with Quarantine
* The following advice is from a Psychologist in New York State with a Psy.D. in the specialities of School and Clinical Psychology. It is some of the best advice I have found so far!
1. Stick to a routine.
2. Dress for the social life you want, not the social life you have.
Get showered and dressed in comfortable clothes, wash your face, brush your teeth, put on some bright colors, etc.
3. Get out at least once a day, for at least thirty minutes.
If you are concerned of contact, try first thing in the morning, or later in the evening, and try less traveled streets and avenues. If you are high risk or living with those who are high risk, open the windows and blast the fan.
4. Find some time to move each day for at least thirty minutes.
If you don’t feel comfortable going outside, there are many YouTube videos that offer free movement classes, and if all else fails, turn on the music and have a dance party!
5. Reach out to others daily for thirty minutes.
Don’t forget to do this for your children as well. Set up a virtual play date!
6. Stay hydrated and eat well.
This one may seem obvious, but stress and eating often don’t mix well, and we find ourselves over-indulging, forgetting to eat, and avoiding food. Drink plenty of water, eat some good and nutritious foods!
7. Develop a self-care toolkit.
This can look different for everyone. A lot of successful self-care strategies involve a sensory component. Some ideas: a soft blanket or stuffed animal, favorite photos, comforting music, a journal, a coloring book, bubbles, mint gum, ginger ale, frozen Starburst, ice packs, and cold are also good for anxiety regulation. For children, it is great to help them create a self-regulation comfort box (often a shoe-box or bin they can decorate) that they can use on the ready for first-aid when overwhelmed.
8. Spend extra time playing with children.
Understand that play is cathartic and helpful for children—it is how they process their world and problem solve, and there’s a lot they are seeing and experiencing in the now.
9. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt.
It is important to move with grace through blowups, to not show up to every argument you are invited to, and to not hold grudges and continue disagreements. Everyone is doing the best they can to make it through this.
10. Everyone find their own retreat space, if possible.
If not, imagine a safe place in your head and "go" there. You can use the Quiet, Safe Place video under the "Student" tab.
11. Expect behavioral issues in children, and respond gently.
Expect possible increases in anxiety, worries and fears, nightmares, difficulty separating or sleeping, testing limits, and meltdowns. Do not introduce major behavioral plans or consequences at this time; hold stable and focus on emotional connection.
12. Focus on safety and attachment.
We must remember that these are scary and unpredictable times for children. Focus on strengthening the connection through time spent following their lead, through physical touch, through play, through therapeutic books, and via verbal reassurances that you will be there for them in this time.
13. Lower expectations and practice radical self-acceptance.
Give yourself what psychologists call “radical self acceptance”: accepting everything about yourself, your current situation, and your life without question, blame, or pushback.
14. Limit social media and COVID conversation, especially around children.
Find a few trusted sources that you can check in with consistently, limit it to a few times a day, and set a time limit for yourself on how much you consume (again 30 minutes tops, 2-3 times daily). Keep news and alarming conversations out of earshot from children—they see and hear everything, and can become frightened by what they hear.
15. Notice the good in the world!
It is important to counter-balance the heavy information with the hopeful information.
16. Help others.
Helping others gives us a sense of agency when things seem out of control.
17. Find something you can control, and control it!
In moments of big uncertainty and overwhelm, control your little corner of the world. Organize your bookshelf, group your toys, organize your paperwork. It helps to anchor and ground us when the bigger things are chaotic.
18. Find a long-term project to dive into.
Now is the time to learn how to play the keyboard, put together a huge jigsaw puzzle, start a 15 hour game of Risk, paint a picture, read the Harry Potter series, etc. Find something that will keep you busy, distracted, and engaged to take breaks from what is going on in the outside world.
19. Engage in repetitive movements and left-right movements.
Research has shown that repetitive movement (knitting, coloring, painting, clay sculpting, jump roping etc) especially left-right movement (running, drumming, skating, hopping) can be effective at self-soothing and maintaining self-regulation in moments of distress.
20. Find an expressive art and go for it.
Find something that is creative (sculpting, drawing, dancing, music, singing, playing) and give it your all. See how relieved you can feel!
21. Find lightness and humor in each day.
Counterbalance the heaviness with something funny each day: cat videos on YouTube, a stand-up show on Netflix, a funny movie; we all need a little comedic relief in our day, every day.
22. Reach out for help; your team is there for you.
There are mental health professionals on the ready to help you through this crisis. Your children’s teachers and related service providers will do anything within their power to help, especially for those parents tasked with the difficult role of being a whole treatment team to their child with special challenges. There is help and support out there, any time of the day. Check out the resources above to connect with mental health professionals!
23. “Chunk” your quarantine, take it moment by moment.
Engage in a strategy called “chunking”—focusing on whatever bite-sized piece of a challenge that feels manageable. Whether that be 5 minutes, a day, or a week at a time; find what feels doable for you, and set a time stamp for how far ahead in the future you will let yourself worry. Take each chunk one at a time, and move through stress in pieces.
24. Remind yourself daily that this is temporary.
We will return to feeing free, safe, busy, and connected in the time ahead.
25. Find the lesson.
When psychologists work with trauma, a key feature to helping someone work through said trauma is to help them find their agency, the potential positive outcomes they can effect. What can each of us learn from this crisis? What needs to change in ourselves, our homes, our communities, our nation, and our world?
2. Dress for the social life you want, not the social life you have.
Get showered and dressed in comfortable clothes, wash your face, brush your teeth, put on some bright colors, etc.
3. Get out at least once a day, for at least thirty minutes.
If you are concerned of contact, try first thing in the morning, or later in the evening, and try less traveled streets and avenues. If you are high risk or living with those who are high risk, open the windows and blast the fan.
4. Find some time to move each day for at least thirty minutes.
If you don’t feel comfortable going outside, there are many YouTube videos that offer free movement classes, and if all else fails, turn on the music and have a dance party!
5. Reach out to others daily for thirty minutes.
Don’t forget to do this for your children as well. Set up a virtual play date!
6. Stay hydrated and eat well.
This one may seem obvious, but stress and eating often don’t mix well, and we find ourselves over-indulging, forgetting to eat, and avoiding food. Drink plenty of water, eat some good and nutritious foods!
7. Develop a self-care toolkit.
This can look different for everyone. A lot of successful self-care strategies involve a sensory component. Some ideas: a soft blanket or stuffed animal, favorite photos, comforting music, a journal, a coloring book, bubbles, mint gum, ginger ale, frozen Starburst, ice packs, and cold are also good for anxiety regulation. For children, it is great to help them create a self-regulation comfort box (often a shoe-box or bin they can decorate) that they can use on the ready for first-aid when overwhelmed.
8. Spend extra time playing with children.
Understand that play is cathartic and helpful for children—it is how they process their world and problem solve, and there’s a lot they are seeing and experiencing in the now.
9. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt.
It is important to move with grace through blowups, to not show up to every argument you are invited to, and to not hold grudges and continue disagreements. Everyone is doing the best they can to make it through this.
10. Everyone find their own retreat space, if possible.
If not, imagine a safe place in your head and "go" there. You can use the Quiet, Safe Place video under the "Student" tab.
11. Expect behavioral issues in children, and respond gently.
Expect possible increases in anxiety, worries and fears, nightmares, difficulty separating or sleeping, testing limits, and meltdowns. Do not introduce major behavioral plans or consequences at this time; hold stable and focus on emotional connection.
12. Focus on safety and attachment.
We must remember that these are scary and unpredictable times for children. Focus on strengthening the connection through time spent following their lead, through physical touch, through play, through therapeutic books, and via verbal reassurances that you will be there for them in this time.
13. Lower expectations and practice radical self-acceptance.
Give yourself what psychologists call “radical self acceptance”: accepting everything about yourself, your current situation, and your life without question, blame, or pushback.
14. Limit social media and COVID conversation, especially around children.
Find a few trusted sources that you can check in with consistently, limit it to a few times a day, and set a time limit for yourself on how much you consume (again 30 minutes tops, 2-3 times daily). Keep news and alarming conversations out of earshot from children—they see and hear everything, and can become frightened by what they hear.
15. Notice the good in the world!
It is important to counter-balance the heavy information with the hopeful information.
16. Help others.
Helping others gives us a sense of agency when things seem out of control.
17. Find something you can control, and control it!
In moments of big uncertainty and overwhelm, control your little corner of the world. Organize your bookshelf, group your toys, organize your paperwork. It helps to anchor and ground us when the bigger things are chaotic.
18. Find a long-term project to dive into.
Now is the time to learn how to play the keyboard, put together a huge jigsaw puzzle, start a 15 hour game of Risk, paint a picture, read the Harry Potter series, etc. Find something that will keep you busy, distracted, and engaged to take breaks from what is going on in the outside world.
19. Engage in repetitive movements and left-right movements.
Research has shown that repetitive movement (knitting, coloring, painting, clay sculpting, jump roping etc) especially left-right movement (running, drumming, skating, hopping) can be effective at self-soothing and maintaining self-regulation in moments of distress.
20. Find an expressive art and go for it.
Find something that is creative (sculpting, drawing, dancing, music, singing, playing) and give it your all. See how relieved you can feel!
21. Find lightness and humor in each day.
Counterbalance the heaviness with something funny each day: cat videos on YouTube, a stand-up show on Netflix, a funny movie; we all need a little comedic relief in our day, every day.
22. Reach out for help; your team is there for you.
There are mental health professionals on the ready to help you through this crisis. Your children’s teachers and related service providers will do anything within their power to help, especially for those parents tasked with the difficult role of being a whole treatment team to their child with special challenges. There is help and support out there, any time of the day. Check out the resources above to connect with mental health professionals!
23. “Chunk” your quarantine, take it moment by moment.
Engage in a strategy called “chunking”—focusing on whatever bite-sized piece of a challenge that feels manageable. Whether that be 5 minutes, a day, or a week at a time; find what feels doable for you, and set a time stamp for how far ahead in the future you will let yourself worry. Take each chunk one at a time, and move through stress in pieces.
24. Remind yourself daily that this is temporary.
We will return to feeing free, safe, busy, and connected in the time ahead.
25. Find the lesson.
When psychologists work with trauma, a key feature to helping someone work through said trauma is to help them find their agency, the potential positive outcomes they can effect. What can each of us learn from this crisis? What needs to change in ourselves, our homes, our communities, our nation, and our world?